The Day That Never Was

It was meant to be a day not to forget. A track day at one of the UK’s best circuits with my good mate Jimbo. A chance to stretch the beast’s legs and for Jimbo to maiden test his new track bike. We couldn’t wait.

But as usual fate had other things in mind for TeapotOne, and with only a matter of yards before I reached the hotel on Monday evening, the twist arrived with a dull crunch.

I couldn’t believe it, the last time this happened I was slogging through the Sahara Desert in 44 degree heat with 45kg of luggage on the back seat. I could understand how the combination of this, and the almighty sump in the desert track, would cause the rear sub-frame to snap. But this time I was simply coming off the M1 onto a slip road with nothing more than a rucksack on my back!

I was literally 500 yards from the Holiday Inn we were booked in to for the night, so I limped the beast into the car pack like a spoilt brat who didn’t get his own way. One look at the bike confirmed it was exactly the same thing, a cracked rear sub-frame, and my track day was finished before I even warmed up the tyres. Bollocks.

My mate Jimbo had hired a van to bring his new track bike up after work. He’d had a wee accident on his Blade last year and decided to track it so this was going to be it’s maiden flight. I gave him a quick call to relay my latest catastrophe and was met with the usual banter, well at least I could get a session or two on his track beast!

20 minutes later Jimbo was back on the phone, “Mate you’ll never believe this, the van just blew up!” This was definitely not going to be our day. With nothing else for it I sat in the hotel bar, trying to get the creative juices flowing with the aid of a healthy tap of Boddingtons. With each pint I’d get ongoing updates from the roadside as he slowly froze to death at the side of the M1. After initially telling him recovery would be 45 minutes, this soon turned into almost 4hrs before he arrived at the hotel on the back of a flat bed truck. Obviously I was waiting with the appropriate sympathy……… and a camera.

As we pushed the van off the truck a big old pool of black liquid could be seen underneath. I was reliably informed this was more than likely the van’s turbo which had gone bang – a probable write off apparently? Dejected and more than a tad miffed, we set about correcting the days wrongs and drank the bar dry.

Early next morning Jimbo received a message from recovery saying a truck would be with him shortly. It would take the knackered van, his bike and kit, and him down to Donington where it’d drop him off and recover the van back to base. The plan was for him to do the track day at least, and a replacement van delivered to the circuit at some point during the day. Who said beer confuses the mind, we accomplished all that after about 6 pints and at 1am in the morning. God only knows what we said to the rental people?

With Jimbo now away I called up ‘Wheels Motorcycles‘ in Peterborough – the dealership I bought the beast from back in Sep 2011. Believe it or not all their new bikes come with a lifetime guarantee so I thought, “what the hell, let’s give it a try!” A quick phone call to their service department and they agreed Suzuki needed to have a closer look, but I’d have to get the bike to them. At only around 70 miles it wouldn’t normally be a problem, but in order to ride I had to crouch on the pegs, resting my credentials on the tank and taking my weight on the bars! Believe me it’s less than ideal.

Wheels Motorcycles, Peterborough

The last time I did this was in the Sahara, in almost unbearable heat, and it was the longest couple of hours of my life. But this time, in the sub-tropics of the midlands, it wasn’t too bad and I was soon at the dealership. After dropping the beast off I was soon on a train London bound, drawing a few bemused glances as I sat in full biking leathers. They must’ve thought the Stig had ballooned a tad! On the way I got a call from James who’d managed the grand total of 1 lap of Donington before his engine cut out and wouldn’t restart.

I think we should’ve taken the hint at the hotel. Until next time.

Bruce